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11 Weakest Superheroes Who Can’t Do Shit

You know how occasionally some things are so bad that they are good? Well, that is certainly not the case with these heroes.

Most supes are born with powers that enable them to fight crime and bring justice to those who deserve it. The few without powers make up for it with sheer will and intellect. Then there are the ones in the following list. The only question that will run through your mind as you go through this list is, “Was the writer having a laugh?”

From mind-numbingly comical to plain silly, here is the list of comic books’ weakest and most useless set of superheroes.

#11 Gin Genie

#11 Gin Genie

First Appearance: X Force #116 (1991)

While Captain America needed a shot of the Super-soldier serum for his powers, all this particular Superhero needs is a shot of Tequila. Quite literally an alcohol-powered superhero, Gin Genie, a.k.a Beckah Parker, is a mutant that makes her first appearance as part of the reality TV mutant group – X Force.

Unlike the other versions of the X Force, This particular team is made up of individuals who care little for each other and are just for the fame.

Gin Genie can create seismic waves that correlate with the alcohol level in her body, i.e., the drunker she is, the more powerful she gets. This mutant gets very little space in the issue and is mostly seen worrying about how she looks on the outside. More importantly, she is not susceptible to the effects of alcohol, making her very likely to hurt her teammates in the process of using her powers. All in all, probably not the best person to have on your team.

Powers:

  • Alcohol stimulated control over seismic waves
  • Ability to create tremors

#10 Cypher

#10 Cypher

First Appearance: The New Mutants #13 (March 1984)

Cypher, a.k.a. Douglas Aaron Ramsey, is a mutant who can easily understand any language, whether written or spoken. Now, this might be a pretty cool power to have in the real world but on the battlefield? Not so much.

This particular mutant is said to be one of the weakest in a fight. He can be seen hiding behind trees a good number of times in the comics. Not a good look for a superhero.

What he lacks in offensive powers, he does make up for by using his linguistic powers to be the in-house tech guy/hacker for the mutants. While the ability to translate any language is quite remarkable, this power has no connection to his intelligence. So, no. Cypher’s power doesn’t make him automatically smarter. He can just understand things well. That helps sometimes…but not enough to win a battle on its own.

Powers:

  • Omni-lingual
  • Super-Comprehension
  • Computer Expert

#9 Bouncing Boy

#9 Bouncing Boy

First Appearance: Action Comics #276 (May 1961)

Bouncing Boy, a.k.a. Chuck Taine, is a DC superhero and part of the Legion of Super-heroes. There is no easy way to say this, but basically, this superhero has the power to inflate himself, turn into a ball and bounce around. The more recent versions of this superhero seem to be helpful, but the earlier iterations of the character are written as no less than a joke.

Chuck obtained his powers when he accidentally drank a super-plastic formula that he thought was a soda. It’s pretty curious how one confuses the two, but it gave him his bizarre powers and eventually enabled him to become a part of the Legion.

What Chuck lacked in finesse, he made up for by being incredibly charming and humorous, making him the self-proclaimed ‘Morale Officer,’ and that must surely count for something.

Powers:

  • Inflatable Body
  • High-Velocity bouncing
  • Invulnerability
  • Size Manipulation
  • Elasticity

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#8 Friendly Fire

#8 Friendly Fire

First Appearance: Hitman #18 (September 1997)

Friendly Fire is a well-balanced, pragmatic individual with the powers of pyrokinesis/energy projection. Sounds great so far, right? Just one little problem. He has terrible aim.

The lack of any kind of marksmanship combined with overwhelming performance anxiety means that he is probably not the best person to have on your team. There is a good chance of you getting shot by him before your enemies. Not good.

You’d think that with a little training and a teeny bit of therapy, he would be able to control the powerful bolts of energy coming from his hand, but the only thing he has been able to hit are his friends. Hence, the name.

Friendly Fire dies by accidentally shooting himself in the head, for Christ’s sake. There isn’t much to be said here.

Powers:

  • Energy projection
  • Terrible aim

#7 Doorman

#7 Doorman

First Appearance: West Coast Avengers Volume 2 #46 (July 1989)

Doorman, a.k.a DeMarr Davis, is a mutant with teleportation abilities and a member of the Great Lake Avengers. The power to turn yourself into a portal is rather nifty, but the problem here is that Doorman can only act as a portal between two rooms that are already right next to each other. Rather literally, he is the power to be a door between two rooms.

This power would be quite helpful to a villain who likes robbing banks and maybe even on some stealth missions where infiltrations are required. Other than that, not much else. In a battle on an open field, Doorman would not be able to contribute in any way.

The most cynical member of the Great Lake Avengers, Doorman, is found constantly weighing the team against the original Avengers. Powers that don’t do much and a bad attitude – not very Superhero-like.

Powers:

  • Darkforce Teleportation
  • Portal creation
  • Weightlessness
  • Phasing abilities

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#6 Matter-Eater Lad

#6 Matter-Eater Lad

First Appearance: Adventure Comics #303 (December 1962)

You’ve probably read that name a few times now, just to be sure. We don’t blame you.

Matter-Eater Lad is Superhero in the DC Universe and is a member of the Legion of Superheroes. Like the other people of his planet, Bismol, this superhero has the power to chew through anything and everything. His name leaves no room for imagination, does it?

This superhero is rarely seen in the comics because the writers found it difficult to develop a relevant use for his powers. The ability to consume anything is not needed often and the struggle to include this hero in a plot is understandable.

Also, the image you would get when you think of a superhero is one of majesty and inspiration, not someone chomping down on the enemy’s weapons. Maybe Matter-Eater lad would have been helpful in the fight against Thanos. You know, make him eat the infinity stones. But then again, the wrong universe.

Powers:

  • Matter Digestion
  • Super Eating

#5 Dogwelder

#5 Dogwelder

First Appearance: Hitman #18 (September 1987)

This particular DC hero might be the most disturbing on this list. Dogwelder fights villains by welding dogs to their faces, and saying this is bizarre would be an understatement.

Dogwelder is part of the Section 8 Team, and very little is known about the character. His face is never revealed; he is always hiding behind a welding mask and never speaks. The only thing we know for sure about this supposed hero is that he collects stray dogs, keeps a collection of them, pounces on Evil-doers, and welds dogs to their faces.

This character was even considered for James Gunn’s “Suicide Squad,” but we highly doubt that it would have sat well with the Dog lovers out there. This peculiar M.O. would be of zero help when fighting enemies. How long would it take for him to weld the dog to a villain’s face? What if he runs out of dogs?

Wait till PETA gets their hands on him.

Powers:

  • Gadgets
  • Control dogs

#4 Colour Kid

#4 Colour Kid

First Appearance: Adventure Comics #342 (March 1966)

Colour Kid is a member of the Legion of Substitute Superheroes. Not a great start. This hero can change the colour of anything he wants by manipulating light.

While the true extent of his powers is yet to be explored, he is mostly useless when it comes to a battle. Colour kid was rejected by the Legion of Superheros on these very grounds.

Other than being able to temporarily confuse a flying opponent, there seems to be no other scenario where this hero would be of use in warfare. There have been a few instances where these powers have come in handy, but there isn’t much that colour kid would be able to offer on a large scale.

Powers:

  • Colour manipulation
  • Illusion Casting
  • Light projection

#3 Arm Fall Off Boy

#3 Arm Fall Off Boy

First Appearance: Secret Origins Vol 2 #46 (December 1989)

Arm Fall Off Boy is the first reject of the Legion of Superheroes, and for a good reason. As his name suggests, Arm Fall Off Boy possesses the ability to remove his limbs and use them as blunt force objects.

No jokes. This character may just be one of DC’s most ridiculous creations, and it seems he was meant to be. He is one of the finalists in his tryouts for the Legion of Superheros, but he panics and literally falls apart during the final stages of the tryouts. Also, The character is said to appear in the upcoming Suicide Squad movie under a different name – The Detachable Kid.

Though there is an argument to be made about being of some use in close-range combat, What happens when he runs out of limbs to throw/use? Does he lie there, limbless? Who knows, maybe he is good at unarmed combat (pun intended).

Powers:

  • Close Combat
  • Limb Detachment

#2 Stone Boy

#2 Stone Boy

First Appearance: Adventure Comics #306 (March 1963)

Stone Boy can turn himself into stone, making him invulnerable to any physical attacks. While that sounds like a handy power, you should also know that turning into his stone form also renders him immobile, just like a rock. Ridiculous right?

He was rejected by the Legion of Superheroes after they deemed his powers impractical on the battlefield, and rightly so. Impenetrable skin is excellent for defense, but if you can’t move an inch, there is no point in using the ability, Is there?

The dumb superhero eventually became part of the Legion of Substitute Superheroes, but that is nothing to write about. His powers combined with the capabilities of Colour Kid are sometimes seen used as a secret weapon, but alone, Stone boy could probably be taken down with a Chizel.

Powers:

  • Body Matter manipulation
  • Durability
  • Impenetrable skin

#1 Hindsight

#1 Hindsight

First Appearance: The New Warriors Annual #3

We’ve been introduced to many weak and useless superheroes through this list, but Hindsight is the one to take the cake.

Hindsight is a member of the New Warriors and doesn’t exactly have any powers to begin with. He blackmailed his way onto the team when he discovered the secret identity of Speedball, and his self-proclaimed ability is one where he gives tactical and strategic advice after something has happened.

Once Hindsight declared himself a superhero and was (reluctantly) given access to the team’s headquarters, he was primarily given computer and administrative duties.

A blackmailer with no superpowers does administrative work and tells you what you did wrong in battle without ever having been in one. There is no better character to sit at the top of this pile.

Powers:

  • NA

Here are a few bad superheroes who are every bit as useless as them but did not make the list.

Honorable Mentions

  • Rainbow Girl
  • Hellcow
  • Dazzler
  • Mr. Immortal

That brings us to the end of our countdown of the weakest superheroes of all time. I hope you found the answer you are looking for. Also, Check out the below questions many fans search for on the web.

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FAQs

Who Is the Lamest Superhero?

Man-Eater Lad is one of the lamest superheroes. His only power is that he can consume any material and does not come with any other superhuman abilities.

Who Is the Least Useful Superhero?

Hindsight is the least useful. He has no superpowers, only gives tactical and strategic advice after the fact, and is only allowed to do administrative work.

Who Is the Weakest in Marvel?

Bailey Hoskins, a member of the X-men, is one of the weakest characters in Marvel. His unique power is that he can cause a massive explosion but only once because he blows up too.

Who Is the Weakest DC Hero?

Colour Kid is the weakest DC hero having only the ability to change the colour of things. There is little to no use of this power in a fight.

What Is the Stupidest DC Character?

Dogwelder is the stupidest character in DC Comics. He welds dogs that he collects to the faces of the bad guys. There isn’t a more ridiculous character.

Who Is the Weakest in Avengers?

Falcon has to be the weakest in the Avengers. With no super-soldier serum to back him up, and if you take away his suit, The Falcon would be defenseless again enemies. Even with the suit, the damage he can do is limited.

Who Is the Most Useless Superhero in Marvel?

Mantis would be the most useless. While there is something to be said about her abilities in close combat, almost all other Marvel Superheroes are visibly superior in power.

Who Is the Weakest Villain in Marvel?

Justin Hammer is among the weakest villains in Marvel. He is just a bad version of Tony Stark.

What Are Some Useless Superpowers?

  • The ability to explode but only once
  • The capacityto turn into any matter but not move in that form
  • The power to change the colour of anything
  • The mastery to detach limbs

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The Comic world is filled with bizarre characters and heroes much like these. Most of these characters are written for comedic effect and seem to do the job well. Whether or not they would be helpful on the battlefield does depend on how creative we can get with our imagination.

Let us know how some of these superheroes could be useful in a fight on our Instagram handle here. In the meanwhile, Keep visiting averagebeing.com for more awesome superhero content.

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