So, you might’ve heard the phrase “don’t rain on my parade” — well, it looks like nature tried her best, but ultimately, Trump’s military parade in Washington, D.C. went ahead on Saturday, rainclouds and all.
That’s right. No, the parade wasn’t canceled. But if you’re wondering whether it was a triumphant spectacle or a surreal dystopian fever dream… the answer is “yes.”
Let’s break it down.
It was Trump’s 79th birthday and the 250th anniversary of the U.S. Army, and the man finally got what he’s been begging for since 2017: tanks rolling down Constitution Avenue, troops saluting under bulletproof glass, and war-era bombers roaring overhead.
But the whole thing happened under overcast skies and light rain, and the parade actually started early to dodge incoming thunderstorms.
Talk about a metaphor.
Now, if you’re picturing a jubilant crowd waving flags and singing “Born in the U.S.A.” with fireworks cracking overhead… not quite. The vibe was more “awkward militarism meets gloomy weather and protest chants.”
Attendance was noticeably underwhelming, far fewer than the 200,000 expected. There were big gaps along the parade route, and most of the enthusiasm came from security fences and Fox News camera crews.
Meanwhile, outside the official viewing zones? America was not in a partying mood. Over 2,000 anti-Trump protests took place nationwide under the banner of “No Kings.” In Los Angeles, clashes erupted between demonstrators and police.
In New York, 60,000 people marched in a nasty rainstorm, chanting and carrying signs like “No Crown for a Clown” and “I Prefer Crushed ICE.” A giant golden Trump puppet on a toilet even made an appearance because, well, 2025.
In D.C. itself, protesters were out in force too, though most were kept away from the parade by police barricades. Chants of “Shame! Shame!” and upside-down flags were common sights.
Despite the threats of “very big force” from Trump himself, the anti-parade crowd wasn’t backing down. The parade went on, but it was very much under protest both metaphorically and literally.
So, back to the questions everyone’s been asking:
Is Trump’s parade canceled?
Nope. It happened. Tanks, troops, and all.
Did it rain on Trump’s parade?
Yes. It rained, it was dreary, and the weather was just bad enough to be annoying but not bad enough to stop anything. It was the kind of rain that ruins your hair but doesn’t excuse your attendance.
Trump got his parade, but Mother Nature and half the country weren’t clapping. Between the poor turnout, the angry protests, and a national mood that’s somewhere between burnt-out and barely hanging on, the whole spectacle came off more like a flex in a mirror than a real celebration.
So what the hell was the point of all this?
From Trump’s camp: it was about honoring the military, showing strength, and feeding that sweet, sweet nostalgia for a country that was never really like the fantasy version playing in some people’s heads.
From the protestors: it was a warning against militarization, against authoritarian vibes, and against a government that sends tanks to parades while ignoring real crises.
To most people with common sense? It looked like an expensive vanity project, complete with fighter jets, $45 million in costs, and lots of flexing… all while teachers still have to buy their own classroom supplies, and people protesting on the roads.
Maybe next time, listen when half the country says, “We’re not into it.”
Well, I write daily (mostly the weird stuff I find interesting). If you like this whole no-nonsense approach, feel free to bookmark and come back tomorrow, or continue reading other stories to make up your mind.
See ya, internet friend.
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