15 Best Deadpool Lines That Make You Laugh

#15

“I know, right? You’re probably thinking, ‘Whose b***s did I have to fondle to get my very own movie?’ I can’t tell you his name, but it rhymes with ‘Polverine.’ And let me tell you, he’s got a nice pair of smooth criminals down under.”

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#14

“Well, that’s just lazy writing.”

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#13

“I had another Liam Neeson nightmare. I kidnapped his daughter and he just wasn’t having it.”

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#12

“Zip it, Thanos!”

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#11

“Negasonic Teenage – what the sh*t!? That’s the coolest name ever!”

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#10

“F**k Wolverine. First, he rides my coattails with the R rating. Then the hairy motherf****r ups the ante by dying. What a d**k. Well, guess what, Wolvie? I’m dying in this one, too!”

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#9

“All of these elderly white men on the walls, I should have brought my rape whistle.”

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#8

“I want to die a natural death at the age of 102 like the city of Detroit.”

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#7

“You’re still here? It’s over. Go home! Oh, you’re expecting a teaser for Deadpool 2. Well, we don’t have that kind of money. What are you expecting? Sam Jackson showing up in an eyepatch and a saucy little leather number? Go!”

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#6

“You know what we need to do? We need to build a f**king team. We need them tough, morally flexible, and young enough so they can carry this franchise ten to twelve years.”

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#5

“It’s a big house. It’s weird I only ever see two of you. Almost like the studio couldn’t afford another X-Man.”

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#4

“Superhero landing. She’s gonna do a superhero landing. Wait for it! Superhero landing! You know, that’s really hard on your knees. Totally impractical, they all do it.”

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#3

“So dark. Are you sure you’re not from the DC universe?”

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#2

“If I ever decide to become a crime-fighting s**t swizzler, who rooms with a bunch of other little whiners at Neverland Mansion with some creepy, old, bald, Heaven’s Gate-looking motherf****r...On that day, I’ll send your shiny, happy ass a friend request.”

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#1

“Please don’t make the super suit green...or animated!”

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